written @ 2:00 am on 02.09.02

Today I told myself that I have to stop cryin' so often. Tears... are valuable. I really can't afford to sob so much! Ev'rytime I cry, many people scold me. I would only tell myself, I dont think cryin' too much matters a lot, and that's my own business only. There's nothin' bothering u all. But today, I suddenly realize, tears bother myself a lot even they don't bother others, while actually they really do.

I cant remember when I start to be so grey. Life to me is meaningless and I dont try to make my life to be a happy one. Ev'rything is changin' . A new life is gonna start. No time can be wasted anymore. Plz.

p.s. I'm not alone really, tx diamond and step!